The Commanding Officer Read online

  He moved in and out of me slower and slower while he came and then collapsed on top of me letting his body rest on me with all his weight. I moved hands up and down his strong firm back massaging his as we listened to the sound of the ocean.

  We both laid there in the sand listening to the ocean waves crashing on the shore. I felt peaceful for the first time in a long time. I felt a release and relief from the sexual tension that I had been feeling for this man. Then combined with the ocean and my naked body in the sand it felt just right. I knew then everything could be okay if he would just open up to me. I wanted to know what he thought about the fact that some of his men said he did not give clear orders, that they did not hear him clearly. To have him just say it out loud to me would be the first step in healing. But I knew that I could not ask, he would have to tell me on his own. that was how it worked with a man like Connor. I moaned and rolled onto his chest laying my cheek against his heart and hearing the heartbeat. There were no words for now, I just wanted to lay here.

  A few minutes later he was rubbing my back and said, "I'm hungry. What about you Doctor are you hungry? Want to go get some grub?"

  "Yes, I am hungry. What do you have in mind?"

  "I know just the place," he said as he slowly stirred and begin to move. I got up and together we got dressed. A few minutes later we were back on his motorcycle driving along the dark Ocean Highway with the cold ocean breeze in our faces. Then he pulled off the road into a dirt parking lot beside a shanty looking roadhouse.

  He turned off the bike and I dismounted and said, "is this a bar?"

  "No, it does have that look doesn't. No this is the best seafood shack along the coast. You are going to love it. The best fish and chips," he said. I laughed at him. Then we walked inside and the smell of seafood filled the air.

  "Commander!" A small older and stout woman yelled at him as he walked in. I guess he had come here often as she gave him a hug.

  "Gloria! We are here for your delicious fish and chips. Two please, and two beers… cold," he said as he walked me outside to the back where there was an open air patio that faced the ocean. It was perfect.

  COMMANDER CONNOR CASEY

  We dug into our cold beers and our after sex meal. It was greasy, crispy, and perfect for a seaside meal. We laughed and had a good time and it felt good to not think about the military or anything else except for our fish and beer. When we were done we played a round of darts and laughed as she continued to beat me. When we sat down for another round of beers and a second basket of fries I realize that I felt very comfortable with this woman. For the first time in a long time I saw her as more than just a piece of ass. I saw her as more then Dr. Roberts the therapist I was forced to see. She's in my head now. Now, she was just Melanie a hot and curvy woman that I enjoyed spending time with and talking to and I felt that I owed her an apology.

  "I'm sorry for the way I acted in your office. I know that you can get in trouble for that, I would not want that to happen. I was just in a strange place. But you have to know it is hard for a man that has been trained to be cold and calculated open up to a woman, especially after the shock of walking in to find out you fucked your therapist the night before without knowing," I said to her.

  She smiled at me and said, "I apologize as well. That is a lot to deal with and I did not take that into account. But look at me, I am not your therapist. I am not the therapist right now, I am just Melanie." She said.

  "Well just Melanie, you should know that before you came over tonight private Martinez dropped by my house and we talked about the mission. He really changed my outlook on it. I really thought this whole time that I had done something wrong, and I did. It was just not what I thought it was. It is very complicated to talk about with someone who was not there. So you should know that I do have some form of relief after talking to Martinez today. I plan on visiting the other soldiers that are in my unit this week maybe find a solution to this whole thing, "I said as I got up to get a cup of coffee so that we could be on our way within an hour or so. I didn't look back at her and I knew that she was probably shocked by my openness, hell I was shocked too. But it felt right, it felt different.

  DR. MELANIE ROBERTS

  We were having a great time at this seafood shack on the side of the road. It was in fact the perfect date, even though we have not established that we were on a date. However a motorcycle ride along the ocean, followed by beach sex, followed by beers and fish and chips at a roadside shack it was a date to me. We played darts and laughed and had a grand time. Being the observant therapist that I was, I had noticed a change in Connor since I last saw him. I did not know what had happened, but something did. I could not come out and ask him as I knew that he would have to tell me himself. I watched as his shoulders relaxed and he smiled and laughed more. He told me stories about growing up, he told me about camping, and he told me about his brothers and sisters with the funny stories about Christmas. I knew that he was letting me in slowly. First this was small talk, but personal, then it would go into military talk. It was just a matter of waiting for it to happen. I laughed and enjoyed his banter and told a few stories of myself to open up as well to him. I really was having a good time with him and I did not want the night to end. I felt like I was so close to getting him to tell me something, anything about what had happened. However, I was not expecting him to open up as much as he did. It was so much more than I had imagined. As we had a break in playing darts and were on our last beer he looked at me and then out of nowhere he began to speak.

  "I'm sorry for the way I acted in your office. I know that you can get in trouble for that, I would not want that to happen. I was just in a strange place. But you have to know it is hard for a man that has been trained to be cold and calculated open up to a woman, especially after the shock of walking in to find out you fucked your therapist the night before without knowing," he said in a casual but sincere way. I was shocked by what he was saying because I did not expect him to open up like this. It was amazing.

  I smiled at me and said, "I apologize as well. That is a lot to deal with and I did not take that into account. But look at me, I am not your therapist. I am not a therapist right now, I am just Melanie." I said wanting him to see me in this new way. I wanted him to trust me and confide in me as a friend, not because it was my job.

  "Well just Melanie, you should know that before you came over tonight private Martinez dropped by my house and we talked about the mission. He really changed my outlook on it. I really thought this whole time that I had done something wrong, and I did. It was just not what I thought it was. It is very complicated to talk about with someone who was not there. So you should know that I do have some form of relief after talking to Martinez today. I plan on visiting the other soldiers that are in my unit this week maybe find a solution to this whole thing,” he said as he got up and ordered a cup of coffee.

  I could not believe what I was hearing, and yet I should have expected it. This was exactly what I was waiting for, this moment. And I was right to know that it would not happen in the office during a therapy session. It needed to be out here, where he was in control of the environment. He was a commanding officer after all and he was most comfortable having the upper hand. Once I realized that, I went straight to his house to give him the option to talk to me outside of the office, and of course because I wanted him. Now he had just opened up to me, he was keeping me informed about what was happening with the soldiers in his unit. What he said about Martinez having that talk, but he actually talked about the mission with him was a big step. That was the type of step that came at the end of months of therapy, but Connor had reached it quickly. I'm sure it was because Martinez came to him, and not the other way around but it was good, it was damn good. He was going to be okay and I knew this. Even though he let me know that way I could not know all the details unless I was there, all I needed to know was that he was going to talk to his soldiers and sort it out. That would be such a weight off of his shoulders and hi
s heart. He would be back in action in no time at all. That made me happy, I didn't know how much I had helped if any, but I would like to think that I did. I would definitely Put this in the report to his superiors that Connor had made contact with the unit and was working it out in a healthy fashion, I did not need to tell the superior where Connor told me this, just that he told me. This was good. I smiled a big smile as I watched him get a cup of coffee and flirt with the short older woman Gloria at the counter. Coffee was a good idea, even though he had only had two beers we were in fact on a motorcycle. I was more than happy to sit there and drink coffee with him for an hour or so until he was ready to drive once more.

  Half an hour later we were done with coffee and joking around and then we were once again on the motorcycle heading back into town. He pulled into his driveway near my convertible. I dismounted the bike and waited for him to do the same. He gave me a look and no words were needed, we knew what had transpired. I gave him a kiss on the cheek and then said, "well good night commander."

  "Good night, sweetheart. I will see you for our session tomorrow," he said.

  I arched my eyebrows at him and said, "you mean you still want to come?" I asked.

  "I do not have a choice do I? I want to get back to active duty, so I have to go through the required therapy sessions."

  "Yes, that is true. Though I have to say you are making fast progress. Perhaps I can talk to your superior about shortening the amount of sessions that you need. That is my professional opinion, not the opinion of your lover." I said.

  "Yum, I like the sound of that," he said.

  “Good, so do I,” I said. Then I walked to my convertible and drove home. The next day was a breakthrough.

  I sat in my office waiting for my session with Commander Connor Casey, not really sure if he was going to keep his word and show up. Perhaps that was just something he said because he was high off of the sex on the beach in a great dinner at the seafood shack. I sat nervously waiting even if he didn't show up I did not know what to expect.

  "Your next patient is here," the receptionist said and she opened the door.

  "Thank you, show him in," I said.

  He walked in and we both were silent until the receptionist left closing the door behind her. Finally he walked over to me and sat in the chair and did not lay down on the couch like he had so many times before.

  "I have to say I had a lot of fun last night. And I don't just mean what we did on the beach, I mean all of that. Being with you it was fun," he said.

  "I agree. I have a lot of fun. That seafood shack is great I cannot wait to go back," I said.

  "I hope that you will go back with me at some point," he said.

  "I would love to."

  Then we sat there for a few seconds in silence as I did not want to push him the way I had been in my last sessions to talk. I just waited for him to say something and finally he did.

  "I think I am ready Dr. Roberts," he said as he looked down at the floor. "I am ready to start therapy and began to find a solution to my problem."

  "All right Connor feel free to talk about anything you were thinking. I am here for you and not just as your therapist. Just talk to me I won't have the answers to your problems but you will see that talking about it will help and that is all that is expected of you. Nothing more," I said delicately.

  Then he began slowly to talk about that day on the battlefield. I did not interrupt him or ask him questions I just listened to him replay the intense moments in his mind out loud. It seemed like a very stressful situation and one that had been weighing on him. As he talked I could tell that he was getting lighter as though a load was being lifted from him. It gave me peace of mind to see him beginning to change before my eyes. He was once again becoming a dominant strongman sure of himself and not doubting his orders. I listened to him talk for a full hour and never interrupted him.

  After he was done talking he asked me one last question and said, "I have something to do tomorrow and I would like for you to come? Do you think you can make it?"

  "Absolutely," I said knowing that it didn't matter what it was. I was there for him. The session was over and he left. I filled out all of the paperwork and made copies of the reports and walked them over myself to the captain. On my walk I once again noticed all of the amazing things that were part of living near and working on a military base. The troops were jogging and military vehicles were being driven around. It once again felt exciting to me. I walked into the Captain’s office ready to give an update on Connor’s status.

  "Captain, thank you for seeing me. I have made a breakthrough and commander Connor Casey is talking about the incident and is ready to begin the healing process. He said so in his own words. Today he replayed the mission out loud to me and I let him speak because I think he had not said it out loud since it happened. As a therapist this is a breakthrough and it won't be long before he is healed and can get back to active duty. He is moving very fast. I wanted to update you on that progress," I said as I handed him the file.

  "That is great news Dr. Roberts. Commander Connor Casey is a great asset to our division and we are suffering without him. All of us here cannot wait for him to resume Active duty. If you say that it will be sooner rather than later I take your word for it."

  "Yes, I think it will be soon. In fact I do not think he will need as many sessions as he has been ordered to go under. With your permission I would scale back the sessions to what I think is appropriate and right for his proper healing," I said hoping that he would not see right through me and that I had fallen in love with one of my patients. It was a secret that we would have to keep for very long time because it was against the rules, not just military rules but of therapist rules.

  "Absolutely Dr. Roberts. We trust in you and know that you will do what is best. If you feel that less therapy sessions will be sufficient then by all means put in the work order and I will see to it," the captain said.

  "Thank you sir," I said as I walked out of the building and back to my office to fill out the proper paperwork. Connor would be very happy to hear of the change. I wondered what he wanted me to do with him the next day. I assumed it was something to do with his bed and I became aroused just thinking about the thought of being naked in his bed. Perhaps we could have an entire day of lovemaking to try to get it out of our systems.

  COMMANDER CONNOR CASEY

  "Your next patient is here," the receptionist said and she opened the door the Melanie’s office and walked me inside.

  "Thank you, show him in,” I heard her sweet voice say. As soon as I heard it the effect was soothing to me.

  I walked in and we both were silent until the receptionist made her way out the door closing the door firmly behind her. Finally I walked over to Melanie and sat in the chair and did not lay down on the couch like I had so many times before. I was serious this time. I wanted to do the work. I knew that I could do the work and get back to being on active duty. It was like any other responsibility. You did a little at a time and then eventually you would be done.

  "I have to say I had a lot of fun last night. And I don't just mean what we did on the beach. I mean all of that. Being with you it was fun,” I said in complete and utter honesty, which was not an easy thing for me when it came to women.

  "I agree. I had a lot of fun. That seafood shack is great I cannot wait to go back," she said with a sweet smile.

  "I hope that you will go back with me at some point,” I said knowing very well that I would be taking her back as many times as I could.

  "I would love to."

  Then we sat there for a few seconds in silence as I did not want to jump right into what I needed to say. I needed to get my thoughts together before I said it. I needed to be mentally prepared for what I wanted to convey to her but still being a man about it. It was a hard balance to strike and I knew that this would be a bit of a shock to her. It however, was the truth. I would not be lying to her just so that I could get out of therapy. I was going to tell he
r the truth because I trusted her now. It’s funny that her as my therapist she is forbidden to consort with me outside of her office, yet that is exactly what got me to open up to her. The fact that we were lovers and were together at our most vulnerable as naked people reaching ecstasy together is what made me gain her trust. So in a way it was good that I broke the rules. It was great that she broke the rules because now I was going to give her access to what she wanted the most, my mind and my heart. I would give her access so t hat she could walk me through this whole mess one step at a time. So I took a deep breath and then finally looked down at the floor and said,

  "I think I am ready doctor Dr. Roberts. I am ready to start therapy and began to find a solution to my problem."

  "All right Connor feel free to talk about anything you were thinking. I am here for you and not just as your therapist. Just talk to me I won't have the answers to your problems but you will see that talking about it will help and that is all that is expected of you. Nothing more," she said delicately and in a soft voice that was comforting to me. It encouraged me to open up more. I didn’t know where to start with all of this so I started with the day in question. It was best to give her the facts as I knew them about what happened that day. I knew that nothing could top being there in person and that she would not know what I was talking about, but she would hear my side of things and that’s all I needed to get off of my chest. To tell her what happened and why the way the outcome came about bothered me so much. I wanted to tell her why the soldier’s injuries bothered me so much and about Private Smith not following orders and how that was my fault. I opened the floodgates and she listened intently. She made me feel comfortable as I talked. She got up and moved about the room as though we were in her living room having a conversation after dinner. She poured water for me, then coffee. She did not say much but she just let me talk and that in itself was very healing. I could feel the difference already as the weight lifted off of my shoulders. This felt good. I don’t know why I had resisted it so much in the beginning. Now, I felt like I was talking to a girlfriend and not a cold therapist. I think that made all the difference. Melanie would want the best for me and she would want me to get back to active duty because that is what made me happy and I was sure that she would be doing all she could to help me get there.